Page 138 - The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

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TO WIVES 117
thing. We urge you to try our program, for nothing
will be so helpful to your husband as the radically
changed attitude toward him which God will show
you how to have. Go along with your husband if you
possibly can.
If you and your husband find a solution for the
pressing problem of drink you are, of course, going to
be very happy. But all problems will not be solved at
once. Seed has started to sprout in a new soil, but
growth has only begun. In spite of your new-found
happiness, there will be ups and downs. Many of the
old problems will still be with you. This is as it should
be.
The faith and sincerity of both you and your hus­
band will be put to the test. These work-outs should
be regarded as part of your education, for thus you
will be learning to live. You will make mistakes, but
if you are in earnest they will not drag you down. In­
stead, you will capitalize them. A better way of life
will emerge when they are overcome.
Some of the snags you will encounter are irritation,
hurt feelings and resentments. Your husband will
sometimes be unreasonable and you will want to crit­
icize. Starting from a speck on the domestic horizon,
great thunderclouds of dispute may gather. These
family dissensions are very dangerous, especially to
your husband. Often you must carry the burden of
avoiding them or keeping them under control. Never
forget that resentment is a deadly hazard to an alco­
holic. We do not mean that you have to agree with
your husband whenever there is an honest difference
of opinion. Just be careful not to disagree in a resent­
ful or critical spirit.