Page 175 - The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

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154 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
cessful in his enterprise, he would have been set on
his feet financially which, at the time, seemed vitally
important. But his venture wound up in a law suit and
bogged down completely. The proceeding was shot
through with much hard feeling and controversy.
Bitterly discouraged, he found himself in a strange
place, discredited and almost broke. Still physically
weak, and sober but a few months, he saw that his
predicament was dangerous. He wanted so much to
talk with someone, but whom?
One dismal afternoon he paced a hotel lobby won­
dering how his bill was to be paid. At one end of the
room stood a glass covered directory of local churches.
Down the lobby a door opened into an attractive bar.
He could see the gay crowd inside. In there he would
find companionship and release. Unless he took some
drinks, he might not have the courage to scrape an
acquaintance and would have a lonely week-end.
Of course he couldn’t drink, but why not sit hope­
fully at a table, a bottle of ginger ale before him?
After all, had he not been sober six months now? Per­
haps he could handle, say, three drinks—no more! Fear
gripped him. He was on thin ice. Again it was the
old, insidious insanity—that first drink. With a shiver,
he turned away and walked down the lobby to the
church directory. Music and gay chatter still floated
to him from the bar.
But what about his responsibilities—his family and
the men who would die because they would not know
how to get well, ah—yes, those other alcoholics?
There must be many such in this town. He would
phone a clergyman. His sanity returned and he thanked