Page 187 - The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

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172 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
active in church affairs. Both father and mother were
considerably above the average in intelligence.
Unfortunately for me, I was the only child, which
perhaps engendered the selfishness which played such
an important part in bringing on my alcoholism.
From childhood through high school I was more or
less forced to go to church, Sunday School, and eve­
ning service, Monday night Christian Endeavor and
sometimes to Wednesday evening prayer meeting.
This had the effect of making me resolve that when I
was free from parental domination, I would never
again darken the doors of a church. This resolution I
kept steadfastly for the next forty years, except when
circumstances made it seem unwise to absent myself.
After high school came four years in one of the best
colleges in the country where drinking seemed to be a
major extra-curricular activity. Almost everyone
seemed to do it. I did it more and more, and had lots
of fun without much grief, either physical or financial.
I seemed to be able to snap back the next morning
better than most of my fellow drinkers, who were
cursed (or perhaps blessed) with a great deal of morn-
ing-after nausea. Never once in my life have I had
a headache, which fact leads me to believe that I was
an alcoholic almost from the start. My whole life
seemed to be centered around doing what I wanted
to do, without regard for the rights, wishes, or privi­
leges of anyone else; a state of mind which became
more and more predominant as the years passed. I
was graduated “summa cum laude” in the eyes of the
drinking fraternity but not in the eyes of the Dean.
The next three years I spent in Boston, Chicago, and
Montreal in the employ of a large manufacturing con­