Page 265 - The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

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250 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
yet. So I was driven to Akron the very next day by
these Good Samaritans and turned over to Dr. Bob
and the then tiny Akron Group.
Here, while I was in a hospital bed, men with clear
eyes, happy faces, and a look of assurance and pur­
posefulness about them came to see me and told me
their stories. Some of these were hard to believe, but
it did not require a giant brain to perceive that they
had something I could use. How could I get it? It was
simple, they said, and went on to explain to me in
their own language the program of recovery and daily
living that we know today as the Twelve Steps of A.A.
Dr. Bob dwelt at length on how prayer had given him
release, time and time again, from the nearly over­
powering compulsion to take a drink. It was he who
convinced me, because his own conviction was so real,
that a Power greater than myself could help me in the
crises of life and that the means of communicating
with this Power was simple prayer. Here was a tall,
rugged, highly educated Yankee talking in a matter-of-
course way about God and prayer. If he and these
other fellows could do it, so could I.
When I got out of the hospital, I was invited to stay
with Dr. Bob and his dear wife, Anne. I was suddenly
and uncontrollably seized with the old, paralyzing
panic. The hospital had seemed so safe. Now I was
in a strange house, in a strange city, and fear gripped
me. I shut myself in my room, which began to go
around in circles. Panic, confusion, and chaos were
supreme. Out of this maelstrom just two coherent
thoughts came to the surface; one, a drink would mean
homelessness and death; two, I could no longer relieve
the pressure of fear by starting home, as was once my