Page 119 - The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

Alco_1893007162_6p_01_r5.qxd 4/4/03 11:17 AM Page 98

98 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
get well, little charity, in the ordinary sense of the
word, is needed or wanted. The men who cry for
money and shelter before conquering alcohol, are on
the wrong track. Yet we do go to great extremes to
provide each other with these very things, when such
action is warranted. This may seem inconsistent, but
we think it is not.
It is not the matter of giving that is in question, but
when and how to give. That often makes the differ­
ence between failure and success. The minute we put
our work on a service plane, the alcoholic commences
to rely upon our assistance rather than upon God. He
clamors for this or that, claiming he cannot master
alcohol until his material needs are cared for. Non­
sense. Some of us have taken very hard knocks to
learn this truth: Job or no job—wife or no wife—we
simply do not stop drinking so long as we place de­
pendence upon other people ahead of dependence on
God.
Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man
that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only
condition is that he trust in God and clean house.
Now, the domestic problem: There may be divorce,
separation, or just strained relations. When your pros­
pect has made such reparation as he can to his family,
and has thoroughly explained to them the new princi­
ples by which he is living, he should proceed to put
those principles into action at home. That is, if he is
lucky enough to have a home. Though his family be at
fault in many respects, he should not be concerned
about that. He should concentrate on his own spiri­
tual demonstration. Argument and fault-finding are to
be avoided like the plague. In many homes this is a