Page 90 - The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

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HOW IT WORKS 69
tion. Then we have the voices who cry for sex and
more sex; who bewail the institution of marriage; who
think that most of the troubles of the race are traceable
to sex causes. They think we do not have enough of it,
or that it isn’t the right kind. They see its significance
everywhere. One school would allow man no flavor
for his fare and the other would have us all on a
straight pepper diet. We want to stay out of this con­
troversy. We do not want to be the arbiter of anyone’s
sex conduct. We all have sex problems. We’d hardly
be human if we didn’t. What can we do about them?
We reviewed our own conduct over the years past.
Where had we been selfish, dishonest, or inconsider­
ate? Whom had we hurt? Did we unjustifiably arouse
jealousy, suspicion or bitterness? Where were we at
fault, what should we have done instead? We got this
all down on paper and looked at it.
In this way we tried to shape a sane and sound ideal
for our future sex life. We subjected each relation to
this test—was it selfish or not? We asked God to mold
our ideals and help us to live up to them. We remem­
bered always that our sex powers were God-given and
therefore good, neither to be used lightly or selfishly
nor to be despised and loathed.
Whatever our ideal turns out to be, we must be will­
ing to grow toward it. We must be willing to make
amends where we have done harm, provided that we
do not bring about still more harm in so doing. In
other words, we treat sex as we would any other prob­
lem. In meditation, we ask God what we should do
about each specific matter. The right answer will
come, if we want it.
God alone can judge our sex situation. Counsel with